so i got a slap in the face.. so to say

Ok this is my first time blogging. i don't type the best and my words are usually slang and a bunch of mumble jumble. Today i realized how i have shut God out of my life in a lot of ways. Ever heard people saying.. "Where is God now?" or "I've grown distant from the Lord". I once heard my preacher say (by the way.. my preacher is sooo awesome!) that God never moves away from us, we just keep stepping backwards from him to the point where we don't care if we miss church, don't miss reading our bibles, and our testimony is hurt because we are so worldly. I have MANY (and i do stress MANY) areas of my life where i have completely fell off the band wagon of what i know is right and my Christian attitude hasn't been the same. I am going to be more specific in my prayers in the areas that i need the help most with my walk with God to help me be the servant he wants me to be. I noticed that KJ-52 (who is a Christian rapper.. kinda) always throws in his song this verse, "No matter what you face in life, you can always find your strength in Christ". That is soo true! We all have problems and we pray that God will help us through them but yet we never fully hand them over to the Lord. How in the world can he help us when we dont even give it all to him? it is my sinners nature to hand it over to God then be like.. well, let me just take it back.. which is having no faith in God and feeling like i should step back in and take over and try one more time even though i failed like a million times before. I have realized that life is hard and in those times are when Christians grow closer to the lord. Its very hard when i cant see the light at the end of the tunnel, but that is part of trusting in God. OK OK OK.. i know that was a little much, but today, i am going to give it all to the Lord stop trying to do things myself. He loves me and he will NEVER fail me. please keep me in your prayers because i haven't been a very good servant and i need to stop being slack.